When There Is Joy Among The Pain
As I write this, the clock just turned over to 12:00am. I was thinking back to eight years ago when Gail and I sat with you as you left this earthly life.
It was peaceful, but extremely painful.
Over the eight years I have witnessed the pain of death through Mom’s eyes, especially during this time of the year. She talks about it, but you can tell her heart still hurts.
She misses you!
How do you find joy in all the suffering? I mean, even when we know with confidence where you are, it is still hard.
Yet, here we are in January, trying to make it through this month. Mom and I have spoken about it several times and at times I am right there with her in all of the pain.
But Dad, this month is different for me. As much as I miss you, there is a greater joy.
It is a little girl.
Her name is Mila Dean Book Lunceford, and she is the daughter of your Granddaughter. She is a couple of weeks old now and boy has her personality started coming out. (well that is at least what I think, she is gonna be like me!)
She has brought a lot of joy back into this family. Mom just glows, when you mention her name, Pam can’t wait to see another photo.
I see an endearing love in Danaes eyes, I’m very proud of her. You would love Zach, he’s a fine young man, responsible, caring and he loves Danae and Mila Dean and Paisley. He’s a good Dad.
As for me, well, I was going through video the other day and I found this moment.
It was the day of your granddaughters birth. After working all day, you drove mom up to Columbia and you were all surprised when you got here because she had come early!
As you gazed through the window, you beamed, no one was going to take that smile off of your face! Someone asked you, “What do you think?” Your words spoken nearly 30 years ago are clear in my head! “She is fine!” I saw JOY that day!
Dad, I didn’t have to look through a window, but the moment I laid eyes on her, I know how you felt. “She is fine!”
And so am I….
I miss you,